"My mother made me tell her I used condoms, and my publicist congratulated me. I'm trying to decide which one was more disturbing." He looked at Carly. "Please tell me you guys didn't read it."

"Don't be ridiculous, of course we read it," Carly said. "We're going to print it out and read bits of it out loud on the bus all day. Especially the five paragraphs where she goes on and on about your—"

"Aaaaa!" they all yelled, and Carly smiled in victory.